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Information Security Action Figures

Be the first kid on your block to own the SURPRISE-HIT of this year's Christmas shopping season... 
Information Security Action Figures!!!
Endless hours of play-time fun...
Use their InfoSec Super Powers to protect the universe from evil!

Collect all 6, at a store near you!

Super-JayTM

This ultimate superhero is able to harden tall operating systems in a single script!

Our expert artisans have captured his likeness in this die-cast action figure, which features:

  • Ultra Kung Fu action grip for serious fight action!
  • Ability to program in Perl, C, and C++.
    (Java programming Super-Jay only available in Japan.)
  • Special pull-string audio with over twenty great Super-Jay phrases, including these classics:
    • "I can code that in 1,000 lines of C over two weeks or in a single line of Perl in fifteen minutes.  Which do you want?"
    • "Dude, that rocks!"
    • "No, I'm totally cool with that."
    • "Yeah, I, like, just wrote up a little script to automate my entire life."

 

Spider-LanceTM

Your friendly neighborhood Spider-Lance action figure captures the true essence of everyone's favorite crime-fighting web warrior. 

Rendered in the highest quality plastic available, the Spider-Lance action figure can:

  • Automatically deploy realistic-looking honeynets to trap his evil foes.
  • React to script kiddies with spider-like reflexes.
  • Shoot honey from his wrists to stop blackhats in their tracks.
  • Scale vertical walls using super suction-cups on his hands and feet.

 

The Ofir Ark-Incredible HulkTM

What happens when a mild-mannered information security researcher working on a remote operating system fingerprinting tool accidentally exposes himself to high-energy gamma rays?  Any comic book fan knows the result is The Ark-Incredible Hulk.  This detailed action figure includes: 

  • Fully jointed hands to easily crush bothersome script kiddies.
  • Automated operating system detection... just point him at a system and he will either tell you the OS type or smash the machine to smithereens.
  • Order now, and get a FREE action figure stand that includes a hackable IP telephone, mousepad, and world-time clock.

 

Stephen North-Cutt-NobiTM

This highly realistic rendering of everyone's favorite Jedi/GIAC Master will make you  the envy of every single kid on the playground!

As you may expect from an action figure of this remarkable quality, Stephen North-Cutt-Nobi  includes these special features:

  • Light Saber with built-in Packet Decoder and IDS sensor (batteries not included)
  • Realistic open-toed sandles for comfort and durability during complete 6-day presentation talkathons.
  • Includes over 60 SANS shirts so your action figure can wear a unique outfit every day for a TWO-MONTH SPAN!

Captain AmEriColeTM

This Red, White, and Blue superhero is a role model for kids around the world!  Imagine the fun you'll have busting bad guys with Captain AmEriCole, the ultimate freedom fighter!  This quality action figure features:

  • Super action shield, which can be either used as a firewall to block attackers, or thrown, laying waste to all of Captain AmEriCole's enemies (action shield projectile use not recommended for children under 4!)
  • The ability to present multi-day information security presentations on any conceivable topic, with zero notice
  • Order now, and we'll throw in a copy of Captain AmEriCole's best-selling book Hackers Beware!  What a deal!

Wonder-ZoeTM

Everyone's favorite amazon princess crime fighter is sure to light up any child's day.  This prized action figure is a must-have for collectors and kids alike!  Wonder-Zoe includes:

  • Super-human abilities for rescuing instructors from time conflicts that could spiral out of control.
  • The Lasso of Truth to compel anyone in its grip to be completely honest about when their course update will actually be turned in.
  • Amazon Bracelets that deflect bullets as well as bogus excuses from instructors.
  • Transparent Airplane for zooming into conferences around the world (shown in background of picture at right) sold separately.

*Note: Information Security Conference Play-SetTM Sold Separately!

Offer not valid in Guam, Wisconsin, or any place else...

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©Copyright 2004, Ed Skoudis